
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/3672933.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M
  Fandom:
      Free!
  Relationship:
      Matsuoka_Gou/Matsuoka_Rin
  Character:
      Matsuoka_Rin, Matsuoka_Gou
  Additional Tags:
      Drama, Family, Love, Grief, Feels, Internal_Monologue, Internal_Conflict,
      Sibling_Incest, Slow_Build, Resentment, Estrangement, Psychological
      Drama, Romance, harsh_reality, First_Time, Loss_of_Virginity, Comedy,
      Funny, Ecchi
  Stats:
      Published: 2015-04-03 Updated: 2015-12-17 Chapters: 8/? Words: 15127
****** The Things That No One Talks About ******
by IxWannaxBexAxScreamxQueen
Summary
     Kou goes through the process of grieving when Rin goes to Australia.
     Because he cuts off contact with her. When she finds out that he is
     coming home. Kou doesn't know how to feel because she has entered the
     last stage of grief: acceptance. After seeing each other again
     following their estrangement. They both have feelings that siblings
     should never have. Yet will they keep up a torrid secret or will
     things fall apart?
Notes
See the end of the work for notes
***** Prologue *****
Kou:
It had been a very long time since Kou had seen her brother Rin. She had felt
like a piece of herself had went with him to Australia. Nothing ever felt right
since then and she just didn't know what to do. How did she keep from breaking?
How did she keep going on? Rin had been one of her best friends. Not to mention
her older brother. When he had left to go to Australia, he left their
relationship alone with her.
All of her attempts at contact had been ignored. The only time she ever saw him
was at New Year's, for the past five years of his absence. The communication
always being minimal at best. Usually consisting of obligated pleasantries to
make them seem familial. And well....not estranged. Even though the body
language alone was awkward. Not counting the inflections or lack thereof of
their tones when speaking.
What had happened to cause this rift? Kou just didn't understand! She could
understand him turning his back on other people. All of his friends and those
from the swim team. But why her?! It made her angry. Sometimes it made her cry.
Most times she tried to pretend like she was an only child. That she didn't
have a brother. It made her hurt even more, more times than none.
During the course of the fifth year without him. The resentment and anger
melted away. Into nothing. How could you feel something for someone you no
longer knew? It made no sense. Almost akin to grieving over a stranger you
walked next to down the street, to see them get hit and killed by a car. You
just didn't. Of course the event would be mortifying. Yet you would remember
they were a stranger and nothing more. Feeling nothing for them. Except maybe
pity.
When her family told her that Rin was coming home for good. That Rin was
retiring from competitive swimming and enrolling into a local school. Kou just
could not believe it! It made her feel a dull throb in her chest. As if she
should be elated at his return, at the same time apprehensive. Kou had spent so
much time going through the stages of grief and the stages of loss. Finally
getting to the point of acceptance. The final stage. She didn't know how to
exactly feel. Instead of the comforting nothingness. Viewing him as a stranger.
Something new was welling up...anxiety.
Kou learned more from her family about his arrival. Rin would not be living
with them. He would be attending Samezuka Academy, living in the dorms, and
that they were highly praised for their swim team. But until further
arrangements could be made on the academy's end. Rin would be staying with them
for a week.
'A week isn't long enough...to reconnect with someone.' Kou silently thought as
her family continued speaking.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rin:
Australia had seemed as good a place as any to go to school. Not to mention the
surf, the waves, and many swimming opportunities that had awaited a young eager
person. Of course it meant leaving behind everything and everyone that he had
ever known. School. Friends. Family. That was to be expected. It came with the
territory. Right? And if he wanted to be anything like his father. Well, it was
the best place to start. It also meant escaping odd feelings, that he had began
developing for Kou - his little sister.
The both of them had just started going through the stages of puberty. When he
had left the country. Rin would feel a confused stirring when she looked at
him, when she laughed, smiled, cried, tucked a strand of hair behind her ear,
the list was endless....The bizarre feelings were only heightened when she
touched him. Something as simple as a hug, poking him in the side, tapping his
shoulder, or playfully ribbing him. Would make what he felt stronger.
And Rin knew even then. What he had felt for Kou was wrong.
Even the feelings went so deep as to jealousy. When a boy at school looked or
even talked to her in a special way. A way that said they liked her more than a
friend. It had made his blood boil. Why? He remembered acting like a total dick
towards Makoto. Makoto giving Kou a rose on White Day. Saying it was because he
thought she deserved it. For being nice to everyone. For being Kou. Rin had
played it off as an overprotective brother, but that hadn't been the case at
all.
Rin was sick. He had the hots for his kid sister.
Australia's distance from home made cutting her off simpler. Easier. Except for
the times that she called leaving voice mails, emails, and even going so far as
to sending letters. Who even sent air mail anymore? Even though he had found
the thought cute. And had to mentally be disgusted with himself for that. Three
times a year his family sent pictures to him. During the spring, the summer,
and the winter holidays.
Rin would occasionally look at them. Seeing how everyone was doing, but mostly
how Kou was growing up. Kou now had long red hair, with accentuating eyes, a
compassionate smile, and a developed body. Rin noticed a partial emptiness in
her eyes in the photos. It made him briefly wonder if that sadness had been
caused by him.
Better sadness. Than an outright disgust about his feelings.
When Kou had started maturing and looking more like a young woman. The family
reunions at New Years were unbearable. Kou would try to entertain him with
conversation. But the sound of her voice made him think incoherently. One time
his family went to an indoor pool just to see him swim again. So he decided to
amuse them against his best wishes. He wanted to drown himself to keep from
seeing Kou in that bathing suit. Rin wanted to drag her in the water and do
unmentionable things with her.
The third year of coming back to Australia after New Year's. He started hooking
up with girls and with guys he found attractive. Rin had always been the
experimental, go with the flow type, when he wanted to be. He did this in an
effort to stop thinking about Kou. At least in that wrong, you're not suppose
to, sort of way. But afterwards he would feel guilty. Rin would feel guilty for
using that person, and he felt like he was somehow betraying Kou. It was far
from maddening.
The fifth year of his absence however. After about two weeks of being back in
Australia, he usually started getting contacted by his sister. But nothing
happened. No phone calls, no texts, no social media messages, no emails, or
written letters sent by air mail. Nothing at all after his New Year's
visitation.
A couple of weeks turned into months. Those months turned into a year. Suddenly
Rin was going back home and with Kou not trying to contact him anymore. He
didn't know what he was expecting to walk into. Samezuka Academy offered him a
dorm room and he had promptly taken it. They had offered him an automatic place
on the swim team, already knowing his record, and he had refused it. His family
didn't need to know that part though.
Only that he was coming home and going to further his education at a
prestigious facility. Which seemed to satisfy them enough to overlook things
like that. That was what he told himself, but when they did ask. Which
eventually they would, he would just have to tell them something convincing.
Rin was more concerned about handling the week under a roof with Kou. His
little sister and the epicenter of his unnatural fixations.
***** The Week: Day One *****
Rin:
The airport had been hell to navigate through. If it wasn't large masses of
annoying tourists ogling the natives like novelties. Then it was groups of loud
and nearly as obnoxious businessmen and businesswomen congesting the place. Or
families with squalling children who kept stopping in front of him. Just to get
the brat or said brats to shut the fuck up. Get them to behave.
It was exhausting.
All he wanted to do was go home, take a nap, eat whatever meal was presented to
him, and then play the game of avoidance with Kou.
Rin saw his mother waiting for him by the doors. Like she said that she would
on the phone and she had also said Kou was going to be with her. Which he had
absolutely dreaded. But made it sound like he hadn't cared either way about it.
Yet when he reached her and didn't see his sister. He mentally breathed a sigh
of relief. Though he knew if he didn't ask why Kou wasn't accompanying her.
Then it would seem rude and callous.
"I thought you said that the Spitfire would be with you." Rin said
nonchalantly, reshouldering his back pack. Spitfire was a nickname he had given
Kou when they were younger. Because her hair matched her charismatic and
sometimes short tempered attitude.
"Oh. She said she wasn't feeling up to it and had homework to catch up on. So I
wasn't going to fuss over it. You are going to be with us a week anyway." She
pulled him close for a moment in a short embrace. "You two have plenty of time
to catch up! Since you are home now." His mother said ecstatically. She sounded
more happy about the 'now home' part.
"Yeah, you're right. So what's for dinner?" Rin asked as they headed out of the
door to the airport and on to a waiting taxi.
"One of your favorites. Nikumiso." She told him as they slid into the vehicle.
Of course it would be. They were celebrating his return after all.
XXXX
"Kou! I am home and I have your brother Rin with me! He's finally home!" Their
mother shouted up the stairs.
The whole ride in the taxi cab home, his mother had prattled on about how
excited she was, to have both her children in the same vicinity as her. That
she no longer had to exponentially worry about Rin's welfare. Every other
sentence that she spoke was about him being home.
Rin just kept smiling, trying to find things to imitate her level of
enthusiasm, and tried not to gripe about her constantly feeling the need to
touch him. As if he were going to disappear at any second. She had more than
missed him after all. Rin didn't even have a moment spared to plot about Kou.
"Kou! Did you hear me?!" Their mother tried again.
There was an auditory sound of feet touching the floor, steps, a door opening,
more walking down the hall, and then the sound of the stairs being descended.
Rin was not prepared for what he saw. Kou gave a half hearted smile to the two
of them - her mother and her brother Rin. She had her hair in a ponytail as
always. It was what she was wearing. A pair of blue plaid skin tight pajama
shorts and white spaghetti strap with a built in push up bra.
The way her breasts were hugged by that shirt, his hands wanted to grip them as
tightly. Rin wanted to run his hands up her legs, feel her inner thighs, and
taste what was nestled between them.
Shit.
He mentally thought, brushing aside rampant thoughts, and keeping a poker face.
"Hey Kou." Rin gave a small wave and what would pass as a warm smile.
"Hello." Kou spoke and the pleasantry sounded sterile. Just as sterile as her
features regarding him as she spoke. "How was your trip?" More sterility.
Rin wondered if this greeting had anything to do with her lack of attempted
communication.
"Ah. It was hectic and made me want to get here sooner." Rin ran a hand through
his hair. Kou just seemed to curtly nod in acknowledgment.
'What the fuck is up with this treatment?' He thought, soon remembering he
hadn't exactly kept close to her. Over the past five years.
"I, uhm, well, I should get started on dinner." Their mother said nervously.
Obviously absorbing the tension. "Why don't you go get settled in Rin? Take a
nap and I will wake you to eat." She kissed his cheek before walking off.
So he hadn't been the only one to notice the indifference from Kou.
Kou turned her back to him on the last step and began heading back to her room.
Rin watched the way her ass femininely twitched as she ascended the stairs. And
he took in a centering breath. This stay would not be an easy one.
Then again with the way Kou was acting towards him. It may just very well be.
XXXX
'My old room.' Rin thought as he sat on the bed. His mom had washed the sheets,
he could smell their freshness. Which made him lay down and rub his face into
the pillowing sniffing. It was seemingly innocent of a teenage boy. Who had
gone years without his family and able to reminisce.
'I wonder what Kou's bed smells like.' The thought had entered his head before
he could will it to stop. 'Does it smell of her natural fragrance or whatever
she scents herself with?'
Rin snapped his eyes open and had to quickly sit up. Where he gripped his hair
with his hand. Apparently a nap was not in his near future. Not after seeing
Kou in that outfit. It awakened what he was trying to desperately keep dormant.
Instead he tried to occupy himself by unpacking his things and figuring out
where it would all go. And while he did this task, he turned on his old stereo,
and played whatever CD he had left in it. Thankfully it was something heavy and
edgy. Altogether distracting. Something he desperately needed. Not thoughts
about banging his little sister.
'I wonder if the old swim team gang is around? If they even still swim?' Rin
thought as he finished filling his dresser drawers. Next came the closet.
Rin's head was half mindedly head banging along with the killer drum solo of
the metal song. Jackets, coats, and suits going on hangers. It wasn't long
until that was done.
He really didn't want to unpack, but his mother had insisted in the cab. It
would make her feel better if he did. Make him being home more realistic
instead of surreal. He guessed he could understand that.
Plus, she had told him that he would keep those things at the house, besides
his absolute favorites. Just buy him a new wardrobe for school. Which he kind
of needed.
Rin stood in the middle of his room and let out a sigh. Trying to think of what
he could do for fun. And that he didn't need to be around his sister for. When
he spied an old game system in the top of his closet.
Holy Shit. Talk about memories. It was his trusty Nintendo 64.
'Let's plug in this mofo and get to adventurin'." He smiled to himself as he
retrieved it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kou:
Kou had been spending her time catching up on her reading. A new book in her
favorite series had just come out. And she had finished her homework for the
summer a few days ago. It was a few reports for history, a science analysis,
and a couple of book reports for literature. Nothing she couldn't knock out of
the park with ease.
Yes, she had lied to her mother about having homework to finish. So she didn't
have to go and get her brother Rin from the airport. Its not like he had told
her lately that he was excited to see her.
Kou snickered. That was kind of funny. Seeing how he really didn't notice her
existence for five years. Plus, as far as she was concerned. She was an only
child. That was the basis she had built for herself. It made the pain go away.
The person spending a week here was a guest and nothing more to her. She would
treat Rin cordially and make sure he was comfortable. But no familial bonds
would be extended. Kou wouldn't allow it. Not after the way she was treated.
She was halfway into her book when she heard the front door open. Their mother
calling up to her at Rin's arrival. Even though she had planned out how she
would act. Kou felt her heart twinge knowing her brother was down there. It
twung happily again.
'Big brother is home!' It seemed to cry out and she had to disconnect from it.
Place herself on an autopilot of indifference.
"Kou! Did you hear me?!" Their mother tried again.
Kou took in a deep steadying breath and made her way downstairs. Though she
started feeling panicky and apprehensive inside.
XXXX
'Oh my god Rin!' Kou's heart cried out. 'It's Rin! It's Rin! It's Rin!'
'Abandoner! Cruel! Heartless!" Her mind screamed.
Kou stood on the stairway. Looking down from the third step at her beaming
mother. Plainly dying of excitement. And Rin looked up at her with wondering
eyes.
Rin was a bit taller even though she had seen him a year ago, muscular as ever
under his shirt, and his hair had grown slightly. Which framed his handsome
face. It made him look like a sophisticated hooligan. Which was exactly what he
was.
Kou's heart and mind warring with each other. But she wouldn't show it. Instead
she kept a placid face.
She got the feeling when his eyes swept over her appearance. That he was
undressing her even though he tried to keep his features neutral. His eyes were
always his downfall. They were overtly expressive.
'Oh my god! Being abroad has turned him into a lecher!" Her mind screamed at
her. 'Then again he is a teenager. The sight of a glazed donut probably turns
him on.'
But why then did she slightly like it? She fought back the urge to blush. Not
wanting him to know she was flattered. Even though pervy. It could be
completely innocent his reaction to her outfit.
And why did she like it?! Was she *that* starved for her elusive brother's
attention?!
"Hey Kou." Rin waved at her, smiling, but his eyes conflictedly looked between
her face and her breasts.
'Lecher.' Her brain thought.
"Wanna see more?' Her heart chided and she mentally bitch slapped herself.
"Hello." The word came out sounding monotone at best. Which she had planned on
making it sound in the first place.
'Good girl. Stick with what we rehearsed.' Her brain told her.
'Tell him how much you miss him!' Her heart squealed.
"How was your trip?" She kept her voice the same monotone and watched as
confusion. Maybe even slight pain flitted across his face before he recomposed
himself.
Did he regret mistreating her?
"Ah. It was hectic and made me want to get here sooner." Rin ran his hand
through his hair. Something he did when he was annoyed or interested. He
definitely wasn't interested in talking about his travel. Was he annoyed with
her behavior?
Well he had no right to be! Serves him right.
"I, uhm, well, I should get started on dinner." Their mother said nervously.
Obviously absorbing the tension. "Why don't you go get settled in Rin? Take a
nap and I will wake you to eat."
Oh no. She had ruined her mother's obviously great mood. She hadn't thought of
that. She fought the urge to run and hug her. Trying to maintain this facade.
When in reality she was just like her mother.
Kou wanted to leap of that third step and cling to Rin tightly. As he called
her 'Spitfire' and to go 'get a life'.
She didn't do any of that. Opting to see how lewd he had become and twitch her
butt while she went back to her room. Out of the corner of her eye. She saw Rin
watching every sashay she made with her ass.
XXXX
Rin's room was quite for a good while. With the exception of the bed squeaking
as he laid down for a nap. His room was right next door to hers. Their mother's
was downstairs and across from them upstairs. On the other side of the house
from their rooms.
Which had made Kou sneaking out to meet friends or even walk around. That much
easier when she no longer wanted to be a good girl. She had never used it to
meet guys. Kou still hadn't really dated. Meaning not at all. She was one of
the few girls in her group a virgin.
Fifteen minutes later while reading more of her book. She heard Rin's bed creak
meaning he had sat up. She kept reading even though she kept her ear open for
more movement.
'Why did I like how he looked at me?' Kou started questioning herself. 'Why did
I encourage him to look?'
No answer.
Except that she found herself going back to their interaction. The way his eyes
were captivated, the movements of his lips, his hair, his muscles...Fucking
hell. Those muscles! Kou started to imagine him shirtless and she about sprayed
blood over her book's pages.
'Seriously?! Seriously?! You're own brother?!' Kou's mind about had a
conniption fit.
Kou no longer thought of him as her brother. She stopped thinking of him as
such a *long* time ago. Realizing she had saw him like a hot guy at school or
even somewhere out in public. She felt nothing towards him like a sibling
should.
'And that is wrong. That is disturbing.' She tried to tell herself. But why was
it so enticing? Why did she secretly want to see how far she could push him? It
wasn't like he hadn't looked interested in her.
His own sister.
***** The Week: Night One *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Kou:
Rin sat across from her as they ate dinner. Which all of them seemed to do in
silence. Every once in a while the three of them would make eye contact. It
however would not be directed for very long before dropping again. Kou seemed
perfectly fine with this. Something she kept telling herself that she was -
'fine'. When in reality she wanted to ask her brother a deluge of questions.
'How was Australia?'
'I bet it is beautiful!'
'Was the surf anything like you had imagined?'
Instead she continued eating her meal, thinking over the questions she refused
to ask Rin, and felt the elephant in the room amass a little more space to
itself. The more time she spent around him. Kou realized that Rin's main
objective was similar to hers. Simply to ignore her unless he wasn't able.
Which was Rin's behavior as usual - how it had come to be over the course of
five years. Nothing new.
"Kou do you need any new clothing?" Their mother finally spoke. "I am taking
Rin tomorrow and school is starting relatively soon." She stared between her
two children. Trying to diffuse the thick atmosphere.
The whole reason not lost on Kou, as to why their mother was making small talk.
A quick memory of earlier replaying in her head - how her facade had upset her.
Not wanting to repeat it.
"Yeah. I do need a few things." Kou poked at a piece of spiced meat with a
chopstick. She leveled a gaze at Rin, who was giving her a cursory one as well.
"Only if it is okay with Rin. I wouldn't want to intrude on an outing."
Rin seemed to relax and tense all at the same time. Kou watched as his
shoulders rolled back, but could tell the muscles were probably taut. A bit of
an indifferent smile on his face and in his voice, "No. You coming along
wouldn't bother me at all."
Kou gave him a smile in return as 'Thanks'. She went to take another bite when
he continued speaking.
"In fact, I was hoping you would come with us." Rin smiled as their mother
approvingly patted his shoulder. Obviously satisfied with the jovial turn of
the situation.
XXXX
The sound of the toothbrush bristles harshly scrubbing her teeth filled the
bathroom. She saw the bubbles frothing in her mouth and pooling over her lips.
The smell of mint filling her nose.
Kou's mind was racing over the scenes from dinner. Everything had been going
fine. Until her mother threw a wrench into her well laid out plans for the
week. Rin also wedged the wrench further into the gears.
Rin.
Her thoughts kept circling him like sharks in the water. Sharks. Rin. Great.
Now a handful of grinning Rin's with grey fins filled her head. They circled
her treading legs as she frantically looked for an escape.
She desperately wanted to get out of the trip. However she knew that she
couldn't. Their mother also wouldn't allow for it and she really didn't want a
lecture on how petty they were being.
'It wouldn't be so bad. Seeing Rin trying on clothes.' Her heart screamed. 'Mmm
those muscles!'
This time her mind had no retort besides wanting to feign being sick. Kou's
heart was slowly beginning to win out and she found herself wanting to find
excuses to be around Rin. Her mind shot these down with barbed arrows.
Reminding her that her brother was only as eager as her; to keep Kou at a
reasonable distance too.
Kou rinsed her mouth out with mouthwash, wincing a bit, she had brushed her
teeth a little too roughly. She gargled and spit out the foamy residue that was
tinged pink.
XXXX
Kou's bed no longer felt right. It was either too soft when laying one way or
too hard when lying another. The other problem being the anxiety tearing at her
stomach. If her resolve to be indifferent was already wearing down after a
single day. How would she fare for the next six days?
'This is aggravating!' She internally griped and flipped onto her stomach -
face first into her pillow. Kou's legs kicking the mattress toe first
repeatedly. 'I want to sleep! Stop thinking about him!'
'Is he thinking of me?' Her heart wandered aloud.
'Why would he be?' Her mind countered. 'In the last five years was he ever
concerned for you?'
'I don't know! I don't know! I don't know!' She angrily screamed back at them
in her head. 'I wish Rin would go away and never come back again!'
'You know you don't mean that.' Her heart sighed.
'Yes, I do.' Kou pouted mentally even though the lie was weak.
'Then prove it tomorrow.' Her mind stated impassively.
'I will. Now can I sleep?' Kou asked her two organ's personifications. Neither
of them answered and she fell into an exhausting dreamless rest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rin:
Not much had changed from when he had first arrived earlier that day. Except
Kou seemed more reluctant to be around him. There seemed to be cracks in her
mask and emotions were showing in spurts. This worried Rin a little bit, but he
refused to show it. If her act was faltering then he would have to work hard
for the both of them. And keep the estrangement going for as long as possible.
Because if it happened - Kou finding out how he really thought. How he truly
felt about her. Either she would shun him and make sure he was outcasted by
their family. Or Kou would reciprocate and Rin stopped himself. Not allowing
the thought to finish.
Rin was sick and he didn't need to infect his sister.
"Kou do you need any new clothing?" Their mother finally spoke. "I am taking
Rin tomorrow and school is starting relatively soon." She stared between her
two children. Trying to diffuse the thick atmosphere.
At first Rin was gong to automatically protest, but decided to see how much his
sister's indifference had deteriorated. How much he had to work against. Kou
had never been good at finishing charade's. In the end they always fell apart
and he was left to clean up the mess. This time probably wasn't going to be any
different.
"Yeah. I do need a few things." Rin internally sighed at her agreeing to going.
Completely wishing she hadn't and cursed; as he saw how happy it had made their
mother. Then his mind went to seeing her in all kinds of outfits. "Only if it
is okay with Rin. I wouldn't want to intrude on an outing."
Rin seemed to relax and tense all at the same time - where his thoughts were
heading. He knew they were going full force into dangerous territory, but Rin
allowed them for a moment. Until he realized he needed to answer the underlying
question. A bit of an indifferent smile on his face and in his voice, "No. You
coming along wouldn't bother me at all."
Kou took in another bite thinking he was done speaking. Rin wanted to see what
other reactions he could get out of her. This one seemed to be of hidden
annoyance.
"In fact, I was hoping you would come with us." Rin smiled as their mother
approvingly patted his shoulder. Obviously satisfied with the jovial turn of
the situation. Not understanding the covert game of cat and mouse that was
being initiated.
One that Rin wondered briefly if he would regret starting.
XXXX
What on earth was he thinking?! At some point during dinner he had decided to
let his imagination run wild. That he was going to let desire run rampant, but
at the same time keep himself at a comfortable distance. If Kou came to him
after he dropped bread crumbs. It would be her fault if she were baited. Right?
No! Ugh! Why did things have to be so complicated?! Things were better in a
stark contrast of black and white.
The glow from his laptop illuminated his conflicted features. A hand ran
through his hair, stopping halfway, and gripping it. He sat in the darkness of
his room - staring at a picture of Kou at the beach this last summer. In a two
piece bikini staring off toward the ocean, red hair whipping around her body.
It was a photo his mom had sent along with some others from that vacation. Rin
bit his bottom lip and he felt his cock jump staring at her curves. Kou's
maturing body being barely contained by the navy blue fabric.
'Oh god...' Rin thought feverishly, his hard flesh straining against his pants.
His mind flitted to what his sister would look like naked. There was a pause in
thought - Rin pulling his cock out. The bedroom door was already locked. A
habit he had formed over the years living in dorms. Better safe than sorry.
Plus, it would not do - If his mother walked in on him whacking off to Kou. Or
if Kou was the one to walk in depending on her reaction.
He started to imagine his sister on her knees before him. Her pert little mouth
taking in his length, eyes watering from his girth, and her warm breath coming
through her nose against his skin.
She would move her mouth up and down his cock, lips tightly squeezing his
shaft, and head moving in quick succession.
Rin caressing her face, running a hand through her hair, gripping fistfuls of
it, his hips bucking and plunging his cock down her eager throat, and his
thrusts becoming erratic.
As he...As he...Rin let out a strained breath in a huff like he had just had a
good jog. His head leaning back over the top of the desk chair, mouth parted in
catching his breath, and his cock twitching a bit in his grip as it went
flaccid - streams of come running over the sides of his clasped hand.
XXXX
Rin laid in bed staring at the ceiling, arms folded underneath his head, and he
listened to the sounds that the evening brought. Some of which included Kou's
room next door to his. Rin heard the rustling of her sheets, her bed creaking
as she tossed and turned about. At one point even her crying out frustratedly
into her pillow - a muffled sound - that sent his mind to pervy places, getting
her from behind.
Shit.
He had to steer his mind away from those fantasies for now. Rin could always
indulge himself later somehow. Maybe another solo session or he could go to a
dance club that weekend and meet someone.
A sound caught him off guard and caused him to perk an eyebrow. Was Kou kicking
her legs? What in the world was she doing in there? Was she okay? Rin almost
about to go check on her. She is his sister after all. But he heard her let out
a resigned sigh. One that he was familiar with from childhood.
It meant that she was giving up. Admitting defeat. The question was what was
she forfeiting over? Did it have to do with him? If so, in what way, how did it
apply?
This made their outing for tomorrow seem all that more interesting. Something
for him to look forward to in fact. Maybe he could test how she really thought
about him. And where those feelings could lead.
No. That was wrong! On so many levels! But the truth was becoming painfully
clear. Rin was tired from years of running away. Possibly he was looking at
things from the wrong angle. He needed a fresh perspective. It was tiring being
this mentally exhausted.
Plus testing the waters wasn't the same thing as swimming right into them. It
was only seeing if the current was a steady flow, too dangerous to tread, or
was worth the pull of the undertow to a new undiscovered place.
Chapter End Notes
     I do not like to add A/N's to the end of my stories for updates. A
     journal was created to do that. If you want to know when this story
     or any of my stories are being worked on. Then make sure you are
     notified when I write in my journal by bookmarking it or subscribing
     to me.
     Here is the link:
     http://archiveofourown.org/works/3748312/chapters/8317318
***** The Week: Day Two *****
Rin:
Rin had never lived with a teenaged girl, nor spent even long enough with ones
he had slept with, to even know what to expect from them in the morning. If he
had known what to expect then he would have awoken earlier. Because if he
wanted to use the bathroom at all. For any reason until she was finished doing
god knows what. Rin would be waiting until the very last minute; before they
had to be out the door. Not that their mother was in a hurry. It was just...
'Annoying.' The thought seemed to permeate his brain.
He was just about to knock on the door after two hours of laying on his bed.
Not even on his worst day was he in the bathroom for two freaking hours. What
did Kou do in there? Even if he had been offered the luxury living in a
dormitory, where even in the most privileged institutions - bathrooms were
shared. For him to have his own exclusive one with the exception of a room
mate. Would he need that much time to himself.
Okay. What Kou used the toilet, brushed her teeth, showered, dressed, put her
hair up, and maybe lipgloss? Because she wore no make up that he could see. If
she did it was minimal at best. That equaled to two hours?
Rin heard the bathroom door open and Kou walked past his open bedroom door. Not
even acknowledging him. A sweet smell of floral perfume trailed behind her. His
eyes barely caught the pink nail polish on her toes. Or the fact her freshly
shaved legs glistened. And he let himself imagine what else she might have
shaved.
It all had seemed to click. Sort of. Rin was still grumpy. He was not a morning
person. Don't let his athleticism fool you for a moment.
Before Kou could somehow have a reason to hole up in the bathroom again. Rin
grabbed his clothes for the day and what hygiene things that he needed. Then
proceeded to walk at a fast pace into the tiled room.
XXXX
"OH! Rin doesn't Kou look precious?" Their mother said with clasped hands.
"Turn around! Let us see what the back looks like!"
'Oh yes. Let us indeed see what the 'back' looks like.' Rin mentally smirked,
but his face stayed completely neutral.
Kou did a quick twirl causing the skirt to spin, the bottom hem momentarily
hugging her mid thigh, before it dropped down. Rin slightly jealous of the
fabric for a moment. She was wearing a black tshirt with grey rose patterns all
over it and a black denim skirt.
The whole shopping trip was mainly for social affairs with friends during the
school year. Both of their schools provided uniforms the cost was included in
the tuition. One of the reasons he had been looking forward to her going with
them.
"It looks nice. I guess." Rin told his mother shrugging his shoulders. Their
mother just scoffed at him and waved him off. When she turned around to look at
Kou more closely. Rin gave his sister a look with only his eyes. Seeing how she
would interpret it. She seemed to be oblivious to it and walked back into the
dressing room.
Maybe he should be less subtle? And more direct?
XXXX
Now it was Rin's turn to try things on and give a small preview to his mother.
The woman refused to buy anything unless it was tried on and knew for a fact
you found it to your taste. Why would she spend money on something you were not
completely satisfied with?
When he walked out of the dressing room, their mother was already nodding her
approval, and Kou was fixated on him. Rin had put on a white shirt that had
multi colored surf waves on it and it was form fitting as well. All of his
muscles were nearly outlined and he had on a pair of acid washed jeans. The
denim loose in the areas that mattered, but made his ass look squeezable.
Rin was just about to head back into the dressing room. When behind their
ushering mom who still had a shopping buzz going, his eyes connected with his
sister's, and Rin about lost it. Kou's eyes were filled with hunger, her face
remained normal, but --
'Holy fuck. Those eyes...'
It was the same expression he tried to get her to read into earlier. So she
hadn't been oblivious after all.
He had to take a few moments to fight the urge of an impending hard on. As he
dressed back into his regular clothes.
What did this mean? Could it really mean that she felt the same? How to
continue proceeding....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kou:
Last night before completely falling asleep. She had decided to at least see if
Rin felt something towards her. Or if she had misinterpreted the sexual signals
yesterday. Ultimately chalking it up to him being a teenage boy full of
hormones. Rin possibly being grossed out if called out on such a thing. So in
case and being prepared for all possibilities. Kou had decided on primping as
much as possible in the morning. It even came at the cost of waking up earlier
than she usually would have.
Rin had barely started making sounds of rousing, as Kou quietly tip toed to the
bathroom.
Firstly, she had brushed her teeth because the minty scent was energizing. Next
she desperately had to potty. Once in the shower she shaved all of the likely
areas - underarms, legs even above the knee, and her most precious place. Not
that she planned on taking things that far....Well, at least not that day. She
still didn't know where they stood. It was in case her mother wanted to peruse
swimsuits. Because knowing her mother if Rin looked at swimwear they would be
too.
Lastly, after drying off, applying deodorant, and a few light spritzes of
perfume. Kou decided to quickly paint her toe nails, they could dry as she did
her hair. She blow dried her hair and brushed it into her usual neat pony tail.
'Rin is a loser if he doesn't appreciate this!' Her heart cried happily.
'Ha! He is a loser all the same either way.' Her mind implied crudely.
Kou almost rolled her eyes in the mirror at the both of them.
She exited the bathroom seeing Rin laying on the bed width wise, his feet on
the floor, staring at the ceiling. When he turned to look at her, she stared
straight ahead, and used her peripheral vision. A small smile creeped on his
face as his chest rose delicately - breathing her in. Rin's rubied eyes looking
at her freshly polished toes and his eyes moving up to her legs. A look of
concentrated admiration.
Kou had to keep from smirking. She wanted to seem like she didn't notice for a
little longer.
XXXX
"OH! Rin doesn't Kou look precious?" Their mother said with clasped hands.
"Turn around! Let us see what the back looks like!"
'Yes dear brother...how does it look? Anything worth inspecting?' Kou mentally
giggled, but made herself look excited to be shown off on the outside. Which
wasn't an outright lie. She wanted to be shown off. In front of Rin.
Kou did a quick twirl causing the skirt to spin, the bottom hem momentarily
hugging her mid thigh, before it dropped down. She detected a small spark in
his eye up until the fabric settled. It was replaced by..disappointment? How
cute.
"It looks nice. I guess." Rin told his mother shrugging his shoulders. Their
mother just scoffed at him and waved him off. When she turned around to look at
Kou more closely. Kou saw how he kept his face emotionless almost bored except
for his eyes. Those eyes said it all - he wanted her. The feeling was almost
possessive. And it made her heart stop.
How she managed to stay composed, was far beyond her comprehension.
XXXX
Once back in the confines of the dressing room. She sat on the bench and had to
grip her knees to focus. Did that really happen? Rin giving her 'I wanna fuck
you' eyes. Not that any male had ever really looked at her like that. Unless
she had never noticed them doing so.
Her heart was beating terribly fast. What was she suppose to do? Say? Did he
make the next move? No. He had already presented her with one. So it was her
turn? Oh god.
'Isn't this what you want?' Her heart asked her.
'I don't know. Isn't this wrong?' She asked herself.
'It never seems wrong when you're in the moment...' Her mind said logically.
'Rin! He wants you!' Her heart ecstatically thumped. 'Go for it! What is there
to lose?!'
'That is what I am trying to figure out....' Kou took a breath wishing she
could just talk to him.
XXXX
As Rin stepped out of the dressing room, it had all felt like Kou had been
punched in the gut. The air had been stripped from her lungs. Of course she had
to act normally in front of their mother. That was almost unmanageable at the
present time.
'Look at them biceps!' Her heart gushed. 'Those washboard abs...HNNNG!'
'They are pretty impressive for a male specimen.' Her mind tried to sound
analytical, but it was mentally salivating.
'And dat grabbable booty!' Her heart crooned.
If there ever was a time Kou wanted to forget formalities it was now. Rin gave
her a knowing look almost mutual understanding.
Rin was just about to head back into the dressing room. When behind their
ushering mom who still had a shopping buzz going, her eyes connected with her
brother's, and Kou mirrored the gaze he had given her earlier. However she held
it longer, deeper, made it more intense, and wanted to leave little
doubt...that she wasn't being serious.
Kou was highly serious. Challenge to conquest accepted.
She barely caught the strain in his pants. Thankfully their mother was too busy
talking.
'Good luck in this game Rin.' She smirked at him proudly.
***** The Week: Night Two *****
Chapter Notes
     This is more of a filler chapter. It is also a way to delve deeper
     into their feelings for one another, a slow build to their
     relationship, and to prepare for the action. I am thinking in the
     next chapter that I will up the ante just a bit. Sorry it is so
     short.
     I would also like to thank all of you lovelies for your enthusiasm.
     You have encouraged me to go on with this particular story. At first
     I really didn't see it going anywhere. Most people seemed
     disinterested in it. I was going to scrap it, but now I am glad that
     I didn't.
     Now onto the feels of our almost lovers.....
Kou:
That evening at dinner things had gone relatively well. Rin was slightly more
talkative with both Kou and their mother. Which seemed to really make their
mother more than happy. A weight seemed to be lifted from their mother's
shoulders, she seemed to be all around more cheerful. Even going so far as to
giggle a bit herself. Something she rarely ever did anymore after Rin left for
Australia. It was nice. Almost like being a family. Kou thought amusingly to
herself.
'Yes, almost like being a family. Where the brother and sister are being
passively flirtatious - around their oblivious mother.'
Nothing about the flirting was over the top. More comparable to meeting a new
friend that you instantly click with. All you want to do is throw good vibes
their way and hope that they can dig it. Rin talked about the gorgeous beaches
that stretched on for miles, the crystalline waters with innumerable depths,
the exotic flora and fauna of the country. Their mother sat enraptured at the
stories he told them. Every once in a while he would give Kou a look. A look
that said 'I missed you' or 'I wish you would have been there'.
Kou thinking back to learning how to deal with grief, building up walls, and
chanting like a mantra how Rin despised her. How she should despise him. Or how
she had tried and resolved to acting like he no longer existed instead. All the
while he had been gone. Where he had been building walls of his own - Not
knowing it was to protect her from him. The monster that he had perceived
himself to be.
She told him about how she was involved with multiple clubs, that she always
tried to be an honorable student, and about some of the school functions she
had attended. Kou peppered in things about her friends and at one point he had
seemed disappointed she never mentioned anyone from the swim team. After what
seemed like Kou talking nonstop about nothing of importance. Believing that her
life without him around had been bland in comparison to his own.
Rin had told them that he was kind of tired and that he wanted to go lounge
around in his room. Even after his open flirtations with Kou while suppering,
he seemed to be slowly throwing his walls back up. He talked less and less. Not
focusing his attention on Kou for much longer. Then again Kou tried to reason
with herself, that he may indeed be tired, she had no clue what his schedule
had been like prior to returning.
XXXX
Somehow her room felt smaller than it ever had before. The walls felt like they
were closer to her bed, the ceiling was hovering waiting to drop, and if she
stepped out of the comfort of her bed - that the floor would swallow her right
up. Kou's chest felt extremely tight for some reason. No matter how many times
she closed her eyes. No matter how long she kept them closed. No matter how
hard she squeezed them. Sleep did not come for Kou.
Instead her mind was going a mile a minute thinking about Rin. She felt herself
without consciously being aware of doing so, pressing her hand to the wall she
shared with her brother, and pressing her palm flatly against the divider
between them.
A sigh came deep from her chest, tears she had no clue she was holding back
spilled forth, all of the actions seeming to happen so fast. Kou trying to keep
up with each one.
'Five years.' Kou thought to herself.
'Five years.' Her mind echoed.
'Five years.' Her heart raced.
Rin had been gone for that long. Now he was back in her life, within her grasp,
and somehow....somehow she felt guilty. Her mind wandering around thoughts that
he had missed her, that he had indeed wanted to experience those moments in
Australia with her, but why....Why had he gone through such vigorous trouble to
ignore her? Why was he showing signs of wanting her that way? Had he always
felt that way towards her? Or was it something that just happened when he saw
her?
Kou admittedly had an overall exemplary day with her family. As a family. Where
otherwise Kou had been prepared to be cold, aloof, and callous with her
brother. For what? Because she had felt spurned? She began wondering if that
even was a good enough reason anymore.
And last of all, Kou was confused about where all of this was heading. If it
was even heading anywhere at all. What if this was only playful banter.
Something for Rin to do as he bided his time before going to the academy. Kou
so agonizingly desperate for his attention. That she would run head first into
an incestuous relationship.
No.
It may account for some of the reason she would, but it mainly would be because
Kou loved Rin. Not only did she love him, if this kept on going, ended up going
somewhere...Kou felt her heart tense as well as contracting with the thought.
She would fall in love with Rin. Her own brother. Flesh and blood.
Would he fall in love with her too?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Rin:
He had decided to slowly open himself up to Kou. Let her get a feel for him by
openly speaking and it was in a neutral setting with their mother present. It
helped make even himself more comfortable. Not as tense as he could have been
given the circumstances. This seemed to also be a good move because it thrilled
their mother. Rin no longer only talking for Kou's benefit, but also to place a
smile on his mother's face.
Once he started speaking he couldn't stop. The words fell out of him. Soon Kou
and their mother were smiling, laughing, and asking him questions nonstop.
Which he didn't seem to mind at all. Usually he would have become irritated
eventually clamming up. Rin did not want to do that after the advances he made
with Kou earlier shopping. He even threw her some encouraging looks. Ones to
let her know how he had missed her, wanted her to be there, and how he had
longed for her. Most definitely how he had longed for her.
Kou seemed to return those expressions while being bashful about it. She had
seemed hesitant herself about the invitation to get chatty. Yet there they had
been enjoying one another's company. Rin almost did not want dinner to be over
with. They were also partially flirting with small expressions, nods of heads,
and an aura of invitation.
Rin never had expected for Kou to reciprocate. He was not fully prepared on how
to deal with such a situation. Especially when he had expected to avoid her the
entirety of his stay. And what about the end of the week when he moved into his
dorm? If he did manage to reveal his true feelings. Would they continue
carrying them out?
His mood slowly started to turn into one of feigned lethargy. Rin needed to be
alone for a little while and to think things through. If he did not have time
to go over possibilities, as they were currently being presented to him. Which
was that Kou was definitely into him. Rin didn't know what would happen. They
could both wind up in a mess. A painful mess.
Kou along with his mother seemed to be disappointed that he was already
retiring for the night. But they did not seem to protest either. Kou simply
gave him a look that he couldn't seem to decipher. And then he made his way
upstairs.
XXXX
Alright. Everything was going to be alright. Rin told himself continuously
while he paced his room. Nothing had actually happened between them yet. They
were only indicating that they liked each other. More than siblings should.
They had not initiated anything with heavy repercussions. Unless Kou was the
type to break over simple flirtations. Rin doubted that.
Beyond all of his mental banter. He was not backing down from his goal. Rin
would confess all of it to Kou before leaving for the academy. Why he had
ignored her attempts at contact. Why he had created a gaping distance even in
person. She deserved to know that much. He owed it to her. For all of the pain
he had inflicted.
Rin had only momentarily sat down on his bed. In the dark of his room he ran a
hand through his hair. And he came to a final decision. Tomorrow he would
invite Kou to his room or show up at hers after their mother went to sleep. He
would refrain from doing anything too drastic with Kou (keep it in his pants).
Neither would he confess to her. It would only to be to talk to her. Hang out
like old times.
Tonight he had started to get to know the Kou that their family knew. Tomorrow
he would get to know the Kou that only Kou knew. This all hinged on if she
wanted to get to know Rin on a personal level. Somewhere down the line after
hanging out it would determine if Rin took it farther. And if he wound up
showing as well as telling Kou how much she meant to him....
However he needed to sleep so he could be fully functioning. He needed all
mental capacities at their peak to make a clear judgement.
***** The Week: Day/Night Three *****
Rin:
Most of the day had been spent filling out more forms from the school. A
representative had come by during the morning. All of the enrollment paperwork
had been completed. These for the dorms, more like questionnaires from the
RA's, so they knew who to room him with. What they expected his personality to
be like when addressing him. Rin found it all terribly dull. His mother had
occasionally come in with snacks and to ask if he needed help with any of the
papers. Each time he had politely turned her down. Rin was almost a grown man.
Surely he could handle his own paperwork about his own preferences.
After he had finished doing that he started skimming over the school's website.
Even going so far as to browse the 'student forum' there. There were messages
plastered all over it. From other boys awaiting to prank each other during late
nights. Freaking out about the teachers and what their class schedules were
possibly going to be. The ones who would be arriving from long distances
panicking about not having friends. Or even a hot girl they knew nearby. Rin
nearly wanted to roll his eyes.
While he perused the forum he came across a few belonging to the swim team.
They seemed to have more than enough recruited members for the new academic
year. There were a few comments acknowledging him attending the school and how
he was a force to be reckoned with. How he had turned down the invitation to
join them. Followed by remarks of disappointment.
Their mother had come to tell him about dinner, but he told her he wasn't
hungry. Which was true. All of the gloomy reading about the academy's swim team
missing out on his skill. That was paired with the nervous excitement of when
his mother went to bed. Spending time with Kou if she agreed. He did not think
that his stomach could handle it all. The food sitting in it like rocks.
Just so he could pass some more time after he knew his mother was in bed.
Allowing for her to get in a deep sleep before creeping out of his room. Rin
had played some of his N64. He had newer model platforms, but this retro system
seemed to comfort him.
XXXX
The knocks on Kou's door were light yet were pronounced. So there was no
mistaking that his sister had a visitor. The visitor being himself. When she
opened up the door, she seemed surprised to see him, he leaned against her
doorway looking roguish. Kou was wearing white pajama shorts and a pink cotton
tank top. She looked like she had been in the middle of doing something.
"Rin? Can I help you with something?" She asked her voice unsure of how to
sound.
He looked at her a moment longer, making her face blush, "No. Only wondering if
you want to hang out."
Kou seemed a tad hesitant at first, "My room or your room?"
Relief swept through him. This wasn't as difficult as he thought it might be.
No persuasion needed on his part.
"Doesn't matter." Then a thought dawned on him. "Do you still game?" He gave
her a quirk of lips. "Unless you don't have the nerve to best me."
She snorted in derision and cracked her door open a bit more. Next to her
bookshelf was another shelf filled with games.
"Who's sister do you think I am? Being leet is in my blood." She started to
giggle and Rin made an awkward face before grinning."That sounded horrible,
huh?"
"Yeah. Spitfire, it did." Rin told her as he tired of leaning and started to
stand properly. "So..." He ran a hand through his hair.
Kou shut her door behind her quietly and smiled up at him. Before following him
next door.
XXXX
Kou sat on his floor with one of his pillows under her butt in front of the
television. A controller in her hand and her skin seemed to look soft, in the
pale glow of the electric screen. They had left the lights off so they could
focus on their game. Rin sat next to her on a pillow as well. They were so
close that the points of their knees touched, from both of them sitting cross-
legged.
There were sounds of buttons being pressed, grunts of frustration at hard
opponents, and the occasional release of tensed breath after a boss battle.
They had almost made it halfway through the game when Rin fully relaxed.
She was in his room. Kou was in his room.
And they were alone.
In the dark.
And her focused gaze was too adorable.
Rin slowly gravitated towards her, cupped her face as she stared questioningly,
and he kissed her.
He had not intended to make a move at all. This had only been to talk, goof
around, and do some bonding. On impulse he had taken things to a higher level.
His mind chuckled at the pun, given the situation. What made it more
interesting is that Kou, did not - slap him, push him away, or even sat there
bewildered. She kissed him back.
At some point she had crawled in his lap, straddling him as he sat up, still
cross-legged. Rin had a hand on the back of her head and one on her hip. Her
kisses were a bit inexperienced compared to his. They fumbled for lip holds and
her tongue though delicious quarreled with his. However he didn't stop her, but
soon the kiss was broken apart by her. She placed her forehead against his,
staring down into his eyes, both of their chests heaving.
There was massive amounts of adrenaline running through the two of them. Kou
was practically trembling all over with it. Her lips were kiss swollen and her
expression was inquisitive, a question hanging there.
"Ask." Rin managed to get out, his voice thick.
Not wanting to lose the nerve before she could do so.
XXXX
"Do we have to go farther?" Kou looked reluctant. "Can this be enough for now?"
Rin was expecting her to ask him to pour his heart out to her. Or to ask when
he started feeling like this. Possibly even if what they were doing was wrong,
immoral, taboo. Instead she had stupefied him. Again. Kou was more concerned
with taking things slow. This had to mean she wanted this as much as he did.
"Yeah. There is no pressure at all." He said noticing he was perspiring a
little.
Kou let out a sigh of relief. She pecked his lips, then wrapped her arms around
his neck, and just hugged him with her head on his shoulder.
"Its not even necessarily that we're related." She seemed to weigh her words
carefully. "I am a virgin and if we do it...and you..." There were sounds that
tears might start in her voice. "Don't leave me, Rin." She held back a sob.
Soon Rin had uncorded her arms from about him and held her slightly away from
him. That way he could speak to her, looking directly in her eyes, while he
wiped her tears away with his thumbs.
"Kou, I am not going to make you do anything. As long as we continue this. If
you want to continue. Whenever you want to stop. Say so." Rin stroked the side
of her face. "And I am not going anywhere. Not now. Right now I am here." He
couldn't promise her that he would always be there. Or that he would never
leave. That was impractical. All Rin could do was let her know she had him and
he was willing to do or not to do whatever she wanted. It was enough to have
this.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kou:
She had spent most most of her day reading the rest of her book. Then Kou
decided to start looking over the social media of the old swim team members.
They all would be going to school this year together. One of her friends had
brought it up in idle conversation. Which should not have been much of a shock.
They all still lived in the same area. Their lives had just taken them into
separate directions and up until now their paths had ceased to cross.
The first person Kou looked up had been Haru, but his account seemed rarely
ever used. It was mostly people posting things to his wall. When he did post it
was pictures of beautiful aquatic landscapes. Go figure. Makoto's profile was
pretty typical and definitely used quite frequently. A memory of him giving her
a rose on White Day bubbled up. It was followed by how mad Rin pretended to be.
Now that she thought about it. Was it anger or was it jealousy? And next was
Nagisa's, suffice it to say, the boy practically lived online when he wasn't
doing something.
A current theme she did notice with all three of them: None of them were a part
of a swim club. Kou felt a sort of sadness for that fact. Each one of them were
talented individuals, who could each in their own right become champions. Kou
briefly wondered why they had not persisted their passions for it. And if they
missed competing at all.
Kou called a few friends to start gossiping about 'the end of summer' news. All
of the students who had dated, the dirty or not so dirty things they had done
together, and some of the highlight moments of their fellow peers. More so the
most embarrassing ones to come up. She never wanted to be out of the loop. That
would be social suicide.
Her mother came to get her for dinner at some point. Rin did not come down to
eat with them. Their mother saying that he was busy preparing for Samezuka
Academy. And that he seemed to need some time to study his fellow peers. When
she had last checked on him he was on the student forum. She wasn't overly
worried and would leave him leftovers in the microwave.
After dinner their mother said she was retiring early for the evening. She had
wanted to spend more time with Rin, but her job really needed her to come in
the next day. She had received the call while making dinner and asked Kou if
she could tell Rin if he asked. Of course Kou said that she would.
XXXX
Kou was on the phone with one of her best friends and they were whispering
about a guy her friend was seeing. Apparently they had almost gone all the way,
but his obnoxious friends interrupted them. Her friend had never been so
mortified in all of her life. Not to mention her boyfriend wasn't very pleased
himself. When there was a knock on her bedroom door. Their mother had gone to
bed a couple of hours prior. The only other person that it could be was Rin.
Rin?
She hung up with her friend and immediately opened her door. Rin leaned against
the frame casually as he glanced at her sleepwear. Ever since they had been
expressing their feelings. They were getting less flustered, well, at least Rin
had been. Leave it to a shark to feel at ease in choppy waters. She took a
moment to scan what he was wearing in appreciation. He was wearing a white
shirt and black basketball shorts. And looked gorgeous as ever. Rin could
seduce anyone wearing a trash bag. So clothes alone really did nothing for the
appeal that was already full force.
"Rin? Can I help you with something?" Kou had wanted to sound as confident as
her brother looked. She ended up sounding conflicted at his presence.
He seemed to take a few seconds before answering, speaking on a smooth exhale
of breath. Was he attempting to seduce her? Kou stared at him, watching his
lips as he spoke, "No. Only wondering if you want to hang out."
Kou seemed a tad hesitant at first, which she was, not quite knowing what he
expected from her as they hung out, "My room or your room?"
Up until she asked that, her brother had seemed relaxed, apparently he had not
been. Rin's shoulders seemed to release tension, he had been anticipating a
different response she bet.
"Doesn't matter." Rin spoke to her nonchalantly, but a light flared in his ruby
colored eyes. "Do you still game?" He gave her a quirk of lips. She wanted to
pinch his cheek. "Unless you don't have the nerve to best me."
Was he being serious? She never had stopped playing after he left. If anything
she had gotten more into the virtual worlds, that gaming had offered her. They
also offered her several hours of not thinking at all. Not thinking about Rin.
She widened her door a little more so he could see her collection.
"Who's sister do you think I am? Being leet is in my blood." She started to
giggle and Rin made an awkward face before grinning."That sounded horrible,
huh?"
"Yeah. Spitfire, it did." Rin told her as he tired of leaning and started to
stand properly. "So..." He ran a hand through his hair. Which made her want to
touch his face or play with a strand of it.
Kou shut her door behind her quietly and smiled up at him. Before following him
next door. She was more than nervous at what awaited her. That didn't stop her
from wanting to spend time with him.
XXXX
Rin hadn't said much when they entered his bedroom. She noticed that it was the
same as it had always been. Never really venturing in there after he left for
Australia. It was nice to have it so familiar. Her brother left the light off
and as he closed the door, she noticed he hesitated before locking it. That was
a habit he had picked up while being away. Kou thought if she lived surrounded
by strange people. She would do it too in order to feel an inkling of privacy.
She did wonder why he had paused before choosing to do so. Not knowing it was
because he had wanted her to know there was a choice to leave. If he left it
unlocked, but decided instead to lock it. In case something did occur and did
not want to explain what the hell they were doing, if someone saw them
together.
He threw two of his pillows on the floor in front of the television and she
took the one to the left of him. They spoke briefly while selecting a game to
start out with and what skill level to set it on. After that it was the sounds
of fighting, controllers being manhandled in frustration, and the two siblings
teasing one another on their game play.
It was peaceful even with the on screen gore. Rin returning more and more to
the boy she had once knew. Kou was genuinely happy with that change in
attitude.
Kou was beating a particularly vicious monster, she bit her bottom lip, and her
eyes narrowed. The creature had crumpled over in defeat and began melting away
on the screen. When she felt more than noticed Rin leaning in her space.
Honestly she had thought he was going whisper in her ear or something of that
nature. So when he kissed her. The controller automatically dropped from her
hands. Kou was stunned. Struck mentally speechless.
And she couldn't hold back. Her hands gripped at his shirt, pulling her tighter
to him, and she moved to a less awkward position. Kou sat in his lap facing him
and her hands let go of his shirt, to become entangled in his hair. When she
tightened her grip on the fistfuls of it. Rin groaned into her mouth and he
placed a hand on her hip. The other on the nape of her neck.
He seemed to be mildly surprised that she had accepted with such fervor. They
gasped heatedly, tongues swirling, and lips seeking to lock only to break for a
new sensation of pressure. Kou felt her brother's hand move to her lower back
from her hip and it slightly turned, the top half of his fingers down her
pants. That was when she broke the kiss and put her forehead to his. Rin stared
up at her face full of yearning.
There was massive amounts of adrenaline running through the two of them. Kou
was practically trembling all over with it. Her lips were kiss swollen and her
expression was inquisitive, a question hanging there.
"Ask." Rin managed to get out, his voice thick.
He appeared to be trying to hold together a sort of resolve.
XXXX
"Do we have to go farther?" Kou looked reluctant. "Can this be enough for now?"
She somehow knew that he didn't expect her to ask that. Of all the things she
could have inquired upon. Kou was not ready for a confession of love and she
was not ready for an admission of his lust either. Kou desired only what they
were doing then. Being together, expressing how they felt with actions, and the
rest could follow later.
"Yeah. There is no pressure at all." There were beads of sweat falling from him
and onto his shorts. She did not care he was sweaty. Actually it made his
natural scent stronger and not in a bad way.
Kou let out a sigh of relief. She pecked his lips, then wrapped her arms around
his neck, and just hugged him with her head on his shoulder. It felt so good to
just hug him and have him hug her back. His arms were strong as he embraced
her.
"Its not even necessarily that we're related." She seemed to weigh her words
carefully. Not wanting to say the wrong thing. To somehow inadvertently cause
him distress. "I am a virgin and if we do it...and you..." He was close to her
now, but would he leave her in the future. Again. When her heart was
practically in his hand, as much as her body currently was. "Don't leave me,
Rin." She held back a sob.
"Kou, I am not going to make you do anything. As long as we continue this. If
you want to continue. Whenever you want to stop. Say so." Rin stroked the side
of her face. His eyes connected with her own crimson jewels. "And I am not
going anywhere. Not now. Right now I am here."
Kou remained in his lap until he said something to make her laugh and her tears
came to a shimmering halt. For the rest of the night they played games and
talked until the sun rose in the sky.
She would take what she could get with Rin. This was enough.
***** The Week: Day Four *****
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
Rin:
Sunlight streaked through the window and warmed the room with it's glowing
beams. Rin rolled around becoming aware of the time and even more aware of
Kou's sleeping body snuggled next to his. His ruby eyes looking at the clock,
it was a little after ten in the morning, and he yawned deeply before slinking
out of bed. Rin deciding to let Kou continue sleeping. She looked so sweet, her
lips barely parted, eyelashes feathered against her cheek. Before falling
asleep Kou had told Rin that their mother worked today. So they had decided to
make the best out of their unsupervised time together. One of the things being
Rin wanting to make Kou breakfast. He hadn't told her this and it would make
for the perfect surprise, for her to wake to.
Rin pulled on an apron and got to work cooking. He had decided to go with
something simple - a cheesy egg omelet with spinach and onion, natto, and
steamed sweet rice with almond milk. When they were children it had been one of
their favorite meals. Rin had mainly enjoyed it because it was a favorite meal
of his father's. Kou had liked it because Rin had liked it and she loved sweet
rice with almond milk. For a fleeting moment Rin thought how funny it was that
he could remember things like that.
Two arms wound around his lower waist and he felt Kou's soft body pressing
against his back. She yawned pretty heavily, a sign that she running on
autopilot, and had barely began to awaken herself. They had both stayed awake
until sometime past five in the morning. It was a wonder either of them were up
and about the house. It probably had something to do with making the most of
being completely alone. Rin felt bad that he liked his mother's absence for
multiple reasons. Not only that he had Kou to himself, but because she wasn't
smothering him with attention. Rin turned around to hug Kou to him, which led
to a mildly affectionate kiss, and he broke the kiss to smile down at her. Then
regretfully had to plate their food to serve it.
"I had to cook from childhood preferences...I hope that is alright?" Rin asked
as he set a steaming plate in front of her. He gave her a slightly sheepish
grin which made her smile brightly. Kou's happiness made her even more lovely
and Rin wanted to kiss her again. However he held back the urge and sat across
from her so they could talk easily.
"Oh no. That is fine..." Kou gave him an appreciative glance before lowering
her head shyly. "Honestly. I would eat anything you made me. You have decent
culinary skills." Rin acted mock offended at the word 'decent' and it caused
Kou to giggle in response. This was such a nice way to start their day he
thought to himself. The whole setting, their interaction, and how they felt for
one another in such a scenario - It was completely natural and all of it made
him feel so good.
Rin cut up his omelet while he glanced at her, "That is encouraging to know."
He took a few bites, chewing in a contemplative manner, and thinking over what
they could talk about. Their mother wouldn't be home til around six. Only if
there weren't any last minute add ons at work. Which still wasn't counting her
stopping by the market for dinner items. "What would you like to do today?"
He watched as Kou finished taking a bite, sipped from her coffee, and took a
moment more to ponder. The sun streaming on her made her seem almost angelic.
Rin felt his heart skipping a beat as he stared at her visage. Kou's eyes
locked with his gaze and she blushed just a little. The already skipping heart
felt like it jumped it with joy. Never had Rin felt so deeply for someone.
"Maybe we could go out for a bit? Possibly a walk around the park and maybe
even the coastline path?" Kou asked him, her hopes high, and she seemed like it
would really make her happy. Right now Rin only wanted to make her happy. He
owed her so much. Rin was determined to make amends for his past transgressions
and a walk with perhaps some ice cream, was the least he could do, but all of
it was a start.
A head nod came from Rin as he finished the last portion of his natto. Before
he went to starting on his sweetened rice. Kou almost bounced around in her
seat and it made him lightly chuckle. She gave him a faux pout for laughing at
her enthusiasm and he stirred his rice as he spoke, "Yeah. I could go for a
walk...become reacquainted with the town."
XXXX
"Do you remember when we use to ride our bikes through here?" Rin mused as he
took a lick from his ice cream cone. They had decided to walk around the
fishing part of town. Eventually coming across a steep street that was paved
over a hill. The beige colored bricks giving off the last of the summer heat.
Making it a glad thing to have bought the cold treats.
Kou nodded her head with a smile while in reverie. She seemed to look up at the
highest point of the steepened street, rubied eyes shimmering brilliantly, and
turned that stare towards her brother. Rin felt as if he were losing himself in
her gaze, almost wishing he would have spent the summer with her, and not
hiding away like a coward. Before they completed walking across the street Kou
spoke, a giggle in her voice, "I remember you racing Haru down it. You were
wearing roller blades and he was in roller skates. We were all cheering you
on..."
"Until Mr. Yasaka came along with his fruit cart and we couldn't stop in time.
Every fruit ever known flew in the air and I had to pry a watermelon off of Mr.
Yasaka's head. Haru just sat there and stared out at the bay below." There was
a pause in Rin's words as he switched the direction of his thoughts. "Sometimes
I believe Haru was meant to be a Ningyo or perhaps was in a past life."
"You're probably right on that one Rin." Kou giggled managing to walk closer
beside her older brother. A way to let him know her feelings without putting
their secret on public display. Rin still thankful for the fact she
reciprocated. She playfully locked an arm with his and slightly hip bumped him,
"I was wondering..." He looked at her questioningly, waiting for what Kou may
ask of him. "While we're out today. Would you mind taking me on a tour of
Samezuka Academy?"
Rin stopped for a moment dead in his tracks and Kou jerked backwards from the
halt, since their arms were still linked together. He had not expected her to
want to see it. In reality Rin had expected Kou to be upset about the academy.
It meant that he would not attend school with her. Nor would he be living with
her or their mother because of the dormitory. The fact that she seemed
complacent with those facts...was honestly a relief. Even more so that Kou
wanted to see the campus.
He himself had not even taken a tour of it yet. Rin doubted that they would
turn him away from wanting one. More than likely they probably would encourage
it. And Kou being with him especially her being his sister wouldn't be
construed as odd. In the end there really wasn't a reason to turn down Kou's
request. Rin also saw it as an opportunity for his personal benefit. He may
also get to meet his room mate earlier than expected.
Kou wore an expression of hesitancy. Probably concerned that she had upset Rin
and had possibly ruined his mood. This made Rin briefly wonder at how people
interpreted his outward attitude. Did he always seem off putting? Aggressive?
Most of the time he didn't mean to, but sometimes boarding school was like
prison. In the way that outward personality kept you from being the object of
torment. Persona was everything. Rin had to quickly drag himself back to the
present, he spoke with great nonchalance, "We aren't too far away. I guess we
could. If you really want to."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Kou:
Even after Rin had fallen into a deep sleep next to her. Kou had a hard time
falling asleep, knowing that he was right next to her, and on some level he was
hers. The whole scenario felt like a heavy responsibility. Kou holding
someone's heart in her hands. It was scary. So scary. Rin too held her tender
heart in his palm.That too was scary, but it was a good kind of fear. One that
made her thankful to be alive. Alive in such a moment. She found herself
tracing abstract patterns on his chest. As it raised with his breath, the feel
of hard flesh under her fingertips, and how her knuckles straightened with
every exhale of Rin's. Kou was lost in all the expression's his sleeping face
made. She was taken aback when he grinned at one point and she idly wondered
what his mind was imagining. Was it her? Could her brother be dreaming of her?
It was almost an hour after Rin had passed out that she finally succumbed to
slumber. Sometime later she had awakened to an empty space next to her and
wondered briefly about where he could have possibly gone. Sounds from the
kitchen as well as a creeping aroma alerted her to his whereabouts. Kou stopped
by the bathroom to relieve her aching bladder before descending downstairs. Rin
wearing their mother's frilly apron had caught her off guard. She watched him
for a moment longer.
Rin wore an expression of easy determination. He placed such care in every
moment of handling the food. Kou knowing that he took all tasks seriously and
this was just one of the many areas to prove it. When he was at a point of rest
while things finished cooking without much supervision. Is when Kou walked up
behind him, pressing her breasts into his back, and wrapping her arms tightly
around his waist. She could hear his heart thrumming through his back. It
seemed happy to greet her.
Kou couldn't seem to contain the yawn that she drew out languidly. Even after
witnessing her brother's adorable act of kindness - making her breakfast. Not
only that, it was one of her favorites, and one that brought back so many fond
memories. Kou was still more than exhausted, but she wouldn't trade last night
for the world. Coffee. All things caffeine were going to be her best friends
today. Rin placed his hands on her forearms to remove them from his waist, he
turned to face her, pinning her between the counter top and his glorious body.
Kou felt his hands on both sides of her face, chin being directed upward, and
warm lips claiming hers as their own. The kiss grew into a burst of intensity
and before it could proceed any further. Rin pulled away to attend to the food
which was finished.
"I had to cook from childhood preferences...I hope that is alright?" Rin asked
as he set a steaming plate in front of her. He gave her a slightly sheepish
grin which made her smile brightly back at him. There was a spark in his eyes.
Much like the one he gave her before kissing her and she would gladly skip
breakfast for a make out session. Kou just didn't want his hard work to go to
waste.
"Oh no. That is fine..." Kou gave him an appreciative glance before lowering
her head shyly. "Honestly. I would eat anything you made me. You have decent
culinary skills." Rin acted mock offended at the word 'decent' and it caused
Kou to giggle in response. Kou had to cover her mouth until the amusement
passed. She remembered how down to earth he could be when he wanted to be.
Mildly she wondered how taxing it was to act bored all the time. When he could
spend that energy enjoying life like this.
She could feel his eyes on her as she took a bite of her rice, he told her,
"That is encouraging to know", in reference to his previous question. She could
tell that he was thinking over something. Slightly noticing there had been a
lull in conversation as they both ate. Even if the silence wasn't
uncomfortable. Kou longed for every opportunity to hear Rin's voice. Finally he
spoke up, asking her another question, "What would you like to do today?"
Kou sipped on her coffee, feeling the warmth in her cupped hands about the mug,
as she mulled over her brother's question. The sun's rays highlighted Rin's
high cheek bones, along with the streaks of natural magenta in his hair, and
she noticed how intently he stared at her with adoration. Kou's eyes locked
with his gaze and she blushed just a little. Rin was letting all his feelings
toward her show in an obvious display.
"Maybe we could go out for a bit? Possibly a walk around the park and maybe
even the coastline path?" Kou asked him, she really wanted to make new memories
with him. More than anything she wanted to make the most of this second chance.
Plus it looked like such a lovely day outside to simply waste.
A head nod came from Rin as he finished the last portion of his natto. Kou
couldn't help being excited. She felt herself involuntarily bouncing with joy
and it caused Rin to almost choke as he laughed at her enthusiasm. She gave him
a faux pout for laughing at her enthusiasm and he stirred his rice as he spoke,
"Yeah. I could go for a walk...become reacquainted with the town."
XXXX
"Do you remember when we use to ride our bikes through here?" Rin asked her
with a big grin as he licked at his dripping ice cream. She looked up at the
raised street. When they were younger it looked like a daunting mountain of
fun. Now that Kou was older she saw it for what is was - a paved over hill.
Waves of heat came off of it in glistening sheets of steam. Making it look the
road was wavering. Nothing except for a mirage.
Kou nodded her head with a smile while in reverie. After a moment her eyes
began to hurt from staring at the optical illusion and once again he was
regarding her with a look of reverence. She really wanted to kiss him right
then, but knew that was unacceptable. The thought of hiding it was exciting, as
well as practical, however it put a strain on her. Kou dashed the thought from
her mind. Before they completed walking across the street Kou spoke, a giggle
in her voice, "I remember you racing Haru down it. You were wearing roller
blades and he was in roller skates. We were all cheering you on..."
"Until Mr. Yasaka came along with his fruit cart and we couldn't stop in time.
Every fruit ever known flew in the air and I had to pry a watermelon off of Mr.
Yasaka's head. Haru just sat there and stared out at the bay below." There was
a pause in Rin's words as he switched the direction of his thoughts. "Sometimes
I believe Haru was meant to be a Ningyo or perhaps was in a past life."
"You're probably right on that one Rin." Kou giggled managing to walk closer
beside her older brother. A way to let him know her feelings without putting
their secret on public display. Even though she wondered how true that still
was. After seeing that he no longer publicly swam. None of the old team mates
did. She playfully locked an arm with his and slightly hip bumped him, "I was
wondering..." He looked at her questioningly, waiting for what Kou may ask of
him. "While we're out today. Would you mind taking me on a tour of Samezuka
Academy?"
Rin stopped for a moment dead in his tracks and Kou jerked backwards from the
halt, since their arms were still linked together. Kou was puzzled at his
sudden stop. A mere moment earlier he had seemed to be in a pretty jovial mood.
Now Rin seemed to be deeply conflicted after her inquiry. Maybe she had gone
too far for asking such a thing of him? She was about to apologize for her
ignorance, but noticed that there was no anger in his features. Which made her
truly confused.
Even though he didn't seem all that upset. More perplexed than anything to Kou.
She still considered apologizing to him, hoping to return him to his previous
mood. All she wanted at this juncture was to be a source of his ultimate
happiness. Not a disruptor of it. There was always the possibility once in the
academy. Rin would cut ties with her again and lock himself away inside of
their walls. When he spoke next it made her mentally jump and caused her
negative thoughts to roll away like storm clouds, "We aren't too far away. I
guess we could. If you really want to."
Chapter End Notes
     Ningyo - Is a Japanese variation of a mermaid like being. It is
     believed consuming the flesh of one will make you an immortal.
     ~~~~~~~~~~
     I really struggled with what I wanted to do with this chapter. That
     is why it has taken a moment to update. So for that I am totally
     sorry. I was torn between continuing the dual perspective of the same
     convo. And just not doing it at all. I am going to continue doing it
     until the end of the week concept. Once Rin is in the dorms -it is
     just going to be alternating pov's maybe. Haven't fully decided yet.
***** AN *****
Hello lovelies!
I have not abandoned my stories or any of my readers! My internet has been cut
off the past month and maybe so for the next month. I thought that I would just
let you all know that. Since all of the chapters of my previous stories are on
my lappy and therefore cannot be posted until I have net again -- I am working
on a new project from my phone: Into The Wild. It is an original story and I
hope that you enjoy it!
Hugs and lots of love,
Queenie
End Notes
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     As always, I want to thank my readership. You make what I do even
     more worthwhile. You inspire me to continue doing what I love. Please
     keep being awesome lovelies!
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